Make space for every child’s story:

This can be done by creating intentional storytelling rituals such as;

• Regular ‘ family story telling nights’ where family members share memories or traditions.

• Life Story Work books or albums

• Invite children to talk about their birth family in everyday conversations

These activities reinforce to the children and young people that  their story is welcomed

 

Celebrate cultural identity actively:

• Embed culture into daily life, not just special occasions.

• Cook tradition meals

• Display cultural symbols, art or photographs in shared spaces.

• Celebrate important cultural or religious events meaningful to the child

Even small consistent actions communicate respect and pride

 

Keep connections alive where safe and appropriate:

• Maintain links with birth family traditions

• Encourage family time arrangements to include sharing stories or cultural practices

• Honour significant dates

This reassures children they do not have to choose between families

 

Create new shared traditions:

Alongside honouring individual histories, build a ‘ this is us’ identity.

• Family days out

• Shared rituals like Sunday breakfast.

Shared traditions build stability and belonging

 

Develop a both/and mindset

• Children in foster care can sometimes feel torn between identities. Adults can model language such as;

• ‘ You can love your birth family and love us’

• ‘Your culture is part of our family too’

• ‘There is room for all parts of who you are’

This reduces loyalty conflicts and strengthens emotional security

 

Encourage ongoing dialogue

• ‘ is there something about your culture we could learn more about’

• ‘Are there traditions you miss’

• ‘What feels important to you right now’

A foster family can become a place where identities are expanded not replaced. This encourages shared stories to grow alongside personal ones .

 

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